Kris Humphries

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Kim Kardashian: Wrap Your Next Gift With My Butt Cheeks!

Next time you buy a gift for a loved one, show them how much you really care by enveloping the keepsake in a paper shroud of Kim Kardashian's butt cheeks. Yes, this is a thing you can actually do now, thanks to the shameless promotion of Kim K. herself. As owner of the world's most famous ass, Kim has plastered her cartoon Kimoji butts all over a sheet of high-end paper and is selling the rolls for $35 a pop. Thirty-five dollars? It'd be far cheaper to DIY with a few copies of her Paper magazine shoot and some Elmer's glue, but that's just me. Actually, no. Because who wants to receive any sort of present wrapped in Kim's ass? We see that thing all day, err day in all of our internet feeds, whether we want to or not. But don't despair, if you prefer the other end of Kim's bod, you can also purchase a roll of the wrap featuring her cry face. At this point, pics of Kim's butt or any other body part is truly just passe and barely worth a glance, because they're not exactly in short supply. Recently, the selfie queen took it all off for GQ magazine, and the only one who even seemed to look twice was her husband Kanye West. Actually, we take that back. Her ex-husband Kris Humphries reportedly described her images in the magazine as "scrumptious," although Gossip Cop refuted that claim. Ironically, even though Kim's ample ass has brought her fame and fortune, she now wants to downsize her badonkadonk. While she's met her goal of losing all the weight she gained while pregnant with her son Saint West, she says wants to lose 12 more pounds of butt weight to get down to 120. "My butt and my hips are the last to go, but I'm not stopping!" Kardashian said. “I want to lose my bum, not all the way but it’s weird how your body changes with different babies," she told fans at London's Vogue Festival last month. “I want to get to Kim 2010-11 so I’m really going to focus and get there,” she added. And when that happens, she can re-brand the wrapping paper as "Vintage Kim" and charge an extra $25. She already sent some to Kylie Jenner, who posted it on Snapchat:

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Khloe Kardashian Memoir: 6 Things We Learned

Khloe Kardashian has a lot to share with the world. The reality star has come out with a memoir titled "Strong Looks Better Naked," passing along advice to fans that range from weight loss techniques to relationship goals. What are the book's main takeaways? To save you time and money, we've already read the book and we've taken away the following six lessons from it… 1. Khloe Hated Kris Humphries At one point, she references her “least favorite” ex of sister Kim and writes of how this person started “started complaining about life at home,” adding: ‘Why don’t you cook for me?’ he told Kim. ‘Khloe cooks for Lamar all the time.’ This happened in front of me, and it really upset me. I told him, ‘That is so rude! How dare you compare our relationships? And why are you being so aggressive? The right thing to do is to ask Kim if she’d consider cooking for you from time to time.’ He didn’t treat Kim with respect; he wasn’t kind, and unfortunately, he didn’t get my point, which I guess is one of the many reasons he is an ex.” 2. She Couldn’t Accept Her Father’s Death She was in denial about her dad’s death: “At the funeral, though, when I saw my father in his casket, I completely fell apart. I don’t remember the details, but apparently I was an emotional wreck, and I’m told that I was so distraught I actually passed out. At one point I fell to the floor kick and screaming, and I had to be sedated. It was really intense. I refused to believe my father was gone. I just wanted to believe it was all just a bad dream.” 3. She Went Through a Wild Phase Following the previously-listed entry, Khloe wrote: “That’s when the partying started.” She goes into detail about her hard-drinking ways not long after her dad’s passing. 4. She Loves Rob, But… “I love him and he knows I love him, but he fell into a deep, dark place and couldn’t find his way back. I’ve tried to help him, as has the entire family, but our efforts have largely been in vain. From time to time, though, he decides he’s going to fix things his way, and he plunges in headfirst. Inevitably, it doesn’t work.” 5. She Sympathized with Her Stepfather, But… Upon learning Bruce wanted to become CAITLYN Jenner, Khloe struggled to accept the change: “I had lost my father, and now I was losing Bruce. Bruce wanted to be a woman and I could only imagine the battle raging inside of his soul. My heart went out to him. But, I saw the transformation as a huge loss.” 6. She Will Always Love Lamar Odom We all know ups and major downs she’s been through with Lamar Odom, but she ended the book with this acknowledgement: “Thank you to Lamar for giving me some of the best years of my life and for everything you taught me about being strong. Before I met you I felt invisible, and after I felt seen.” View Slideshow