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Is Lindsay Lohan Going To Jail? Like, For Real This Time?

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Remember when Lindsay Lohan tried to bullshit a judge by claiming that she did all of her court-ordered community service at the very last second by doing things like greeting fans after her shitty play in London’s West End? Most people with half a brain were all like, “Huh?” Thankfully, the judge ordered her to redo 125 of those hours, and as of today, she’s only done 10 of those hours. That means she’s got 115 hours of community service left to do… by the deadline of May 28. LOL!

From The AP:

Judge Mark Young said Thursday he was concerned the actress had completed fewer than 10 hours of service over three years.

Lohan is on probation for a 2012 reckless driving case filed after she crashed her sports car in Santa Monica on her way to a film shoot.

Lohan’s lawyer Shawn Holley says the “Mean Girls” star will move from London to complete about 115 remaining hours of service working with kids in New York.

Santa Monica city prosecutor Melanie Skehar was skeptical Lohan could pull off the feat by May 28.

Skehar says her office will be seeking jail time if Lohan fails.

Lohan was not required to attend Thursday’s hearing.

There are literally a little more than 2 weeks left before the deadline, which means that Lindsay would literally have to do more than 40 hours a week if she wants a shot in hell in getting it done. Will she? Of course not. Will she actually go to jail? Doubtful.

But listen to this! Apparently even the 10 hours Lindsay did were bullshit, according to TMZ:

As we reported, Lindsay has completed less than 10 of her 125 community service hours, and now we found out even the 10 hours are suspect.

We looked over some court docs, Lindsay got credit for organizing and posting pics on the Facebook page of the London-based community service org. Here’s the problem … a staff member gave Lindsay a memory stick, which allowed her to do the work in the comfort of her apartment.

It’s unclear whether Lindsay really posted the pics or whether it was just left to her assistant, but when the head honcho of the community service place found out Lindsay worked from home, she wrote an apology for the screw up to the judge.

How is this a real thing? What the hell kinda bullshit staff member gives someone doing COMMUNITY SERVICE the availability to do work UNSUPERVISED at home, meaning she can easily pass the task off and not do it at all, which is clearly what happened? Make this girl clean toilets or some shit, for God’s sake.

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Lindsay Lohan Is Banned From Leaving Rehab – Let’s See How Long That Lasts

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Lindsay Lohan may be “safely ensconced” at the Betty Ford Center in LA to serve out her mandatory rehab sentence, but that hasn’t stopped her from trying every trick in the book to get out of there. However, turns out that’s not going to happen, as a judge has decreed that she’s not allowed to leave the grounds. Yeah, okay, let’s see how long that lows.

From People:

Lohan, who’s serving a 90-day sentence at the Rancho Mirage, Calif., facility for violating probation, will be confined to the sprawling desert grounds, according to a letter addressed to Lohan’s attorney Shawn Holley and filed with the L.A. Superior Court.

“It is understood by the Betty Ford Center that your client is to remain on the premises for the duration of her 90-day stay in treatment,” the document reads.

But the facility is a far cry from a lock-down penitentiary.

“We can’t hold a patient against their will, we can’t stop a patient from running away. We’re not a jail,” an intake counselor previously explained to PEOPLE. “But we closely monitor patients via security and technicians 24 hours a day.”

Patients are forbidden from having a cell phone, can only make brief calls or use the Internet on weekends, and are drug tested randomly.

The letter adds that Lohan will be treated by a battery of experts, including a physician, nurse, psychologist, case manager, spiritual care counselor, family counselor, dietician, fitness trainer and a chemical dependency technician in a strict hour-by-hour schedule, usually starting at 6 a.m. and ending at 9 p.m.

“There is physical exercise and group therapy everyday,” the counselor explained. “This is not a vacation.”

LOL! Yeah, okay, good luck on enforcing that. Can’t wait to see how she goes waltzing on out of there within the next week on some ludicrous grounds and then, you know, has no repercussions for her actions. Why do we even bother anymore? If you have to clarify to a repeat criminal that a mandatory rehab sentence is “not a vacation”, we have a problem.

Special thanks to Evill Beet Gossip