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Of course Lindsay Lohan is maintaining her sobriety & other Coachella photos

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Ah, Coachella time is upon us again. Coachella is actually one of my least favorite events to cover, just because A) trendy faux-hipsters, B) drugs and C) terrible casual fashion. Bedhead even discussed how a lot of companies are paying starlets/actresses/reality stars to be photographed at Coachella wearing their stuff. Tedious. I maybe (maybe!) would have been into this when I was 19 years old, but I do think it’s sad for 40-somethings to still do the Coachella thing year after year. Speaking of sad, Lindsay Lohan was there. Because… sobriety. I’m just covering everything in a big photo post from this weekend’s activities – Bedhead and I will have more coverage throughout the week, I’m sure.

Here’s Zoe Kravitz and her “new boyfriend” Noah Becker. When exactly did that happen? I miss Penn Badgley.

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Selena Gomez is now in the clutches of Kylie and Kendall Jenner. How does that make you feel? It makes me sad for Selena. All three girls look so ridiculous.

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Paris and Nicky Hilton. Because of course.

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KATE BOSWORTH IS HERE TO POSE. PLEASE TAKE PHOTOS OF KATE BOSWORTH.

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I’m also including photos of Kellan Lutz (KELLAN LUTZ), Hilary Duff (with Mike Comrie), Aaron Paul (he was on drugs or “high on life”), Lance Bass and his boyfriend Michael Turchin (look at Lance’s jeans!!!!), and Joe Jonas convincingly (ha) making out with his girlfriend “Blanda Eggenschwiler” (worst stage name ever).

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Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

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Thanks to Cele Bitchy

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Joe Jonas Totally Isn’t a Heroin Addict!

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Are we all doing okay since the Jonas Brothers broke up? Have you been crying into a pint of Ben & Jerry’s every night as you listen to *insert the name of one of their songs here because I can’t name a single one without Google* on repeat? Well, there was a lot of talk that a huge part of the reason behind the brothers’ decision to go their separate ways was Joe‘s alleged heroin problem. However, Joe has finally (weeks later) spoken out against this, insisting that he’s never tried the drug in his life.

From People:

“It’s ridiculous! We’re not saying anything for two or three weeks and I’m a drug addict!”

What upset him even more is that his girlfriend, Blanda Eggenschwiler, was also dragged into the rumors. “It’s obviously not true. I’ve never touched heroin in my life. Neither has my girlfriend,” he said. “It’s hilarious to me, but also frustrating as well. It pissed me off when it’s about my girl and even about myself.”

At one point, he said, people even approached him personally about it. “I was walking down the street and people are asking me if they can give me a hug and how rehab is,” says Joe. “I’m like, ‘You tell me because I’ve never been.’ “

Apparently he didn’t speak out on this right away because he was upset about the Jonas Brothers breaking up and he needed to “clear his head”… or does he mean “detox in rehab”? I’m not sure about this one. I don’t know enough about Joe Jonas (thank God) to know whether or not there’s any truth to the heroin rumours, but considering how some of these other Disney stars have ended up over the years, I wouldn’t put it past him.

What do you think – vicious rumour, or has Joe Jonas been smoking some black tar shit?

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Thanks to Evil Beet

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Joe Jonas Denies Using a Ball Gag, Having a Sex Tape

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Joe Jonas, one of the Jonas brothers three, is accused of having a sex tape out there with his hipster-looking girlfriend. A sex tape with some kinky stuff. But the curly haired Jonas Brother dismissed it via Twitter, tweeting:

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I loled.

Whether it’s real or not, you’d be really surprised by what some seemingly clean-cut guys (with maybe small penises) are into…

BlindGossip has alllll of the explicit details of the alleged tape:

The sex tape was made earlier this month in a room at Park Tower, a hotel in Buenos Aries, Argentina. Blanda, who describes herself as model from Switzerland, is traveling with the Jonas Brothers while they are on tour in South America.

The people who were in the room while the tape was being made were Joe, Blanda, and the photographer/videographer. The p/v is a friend of the couple, and was asked to shoot the video because they both trusted him. In addition to the video, he also took some very explicit nude photos of the couple.

At the beginning of the video, Joe and Blanda are sitting on the bed together. They are both drinking and smoking pot, and Blanda explains to Joe what she is going to do to him in detail.

They proceed to engage in multiple sex acts utilizing a variety of sex toys, including a large dildo, a gag ball, and a slapper paddle. Joe participates willingly, but seems less sure of how to use the sex toys, as well as how they will be used on him. He does not enjoy being paddled. At one point he has had enough and cries “Owww! Don’t do that anymore!” Blanda is the more dominant one in the video. At one point she inserts the dildo inside of herself, orders Joe to “lick my p**** juice off of it,” and he complies.

The couple is very vocal and there is a lot of overly dramatic screaming and moaning. The sex is explicit, and there are multiple close-up shots of Joe’s face, penis and testicles, as well as Blanda’s face, breasts, and vagina. In between sex acts, they consume shots of alcohol. The video looks as if it was shot over the course of several hours, and some scenes were shot multiple times, so we do not know which takes will appear on the final cut. Both Joe and Blanda start out sober but appear to be inebriated by the end of it.

BlindGossip.com has received multiple tips over the past year from people close to Joe Jonas. They report that he is very depressed about his career and that his drug and alcohol use has spiraled out of control. They are most concerned about his frequent use of hard drugs and his close association with others who use cocaine and heroin. They say that he has lost almost 20 lbs over the past couple of months and attribute it to his drug use. They also report that his substance abuse has increased significantly in both quantity and frequency since he began dating Eggenschwiler in 2012.

The Jonas family has been acutely aware of Joe’s drinking and drug habits for over a year. They have encouraged him to seek treatment, but he has thus far refused, adamantly insisting that he does not have a problem. Since he is an adult, they cannot force him to go to rehab.

Our sources tell us that Blanda planned the sex tape as a way to bolster her own fame and to make money. She encouraged Joe to participate, recruited the professional photographer/videographer, provided the sex toys, and directed all of the action.

Eggenschwiler has been working in conjunction with a celebrity sex tape distributor to facilitate the release of the video. She will receive a 35% cut of the video’s revenues. Since we broke the story before the official April 3rd release date, we believe that the distributor will now accelerate his time frame and will start contacting media outlets in the next 24 hours in an attempt to sell the tape and photos.

Eggenschwiler has told friends that Jonas was merely a stepping stone for her, that she has no interest in staying with him once the tape is out, and that she hopes that the sex tape will launch her career “like Kim Kardashian.” Eggenschwiler will deny her involvement in the distribution of the tape, and will express embarrassment about its release in the hopes of avoiding a backlash from Jonas supporters.

While Jonas actively participated in the creation of the tape, we do not know if he is aware that Eggenschwiler has given the tape to a distributor and that she has a significant financial stake in its sale.

Source: Evilbeetgossip.com