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Rihanna and Shakira Are Humping Walls in the ‘Can’t Remember to Forget You’ Video

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It was recently announced that Shakira and Rihanna had formed an unlikely duo for Shakira’s new single, ‘Can’t Remember to Forget You’, a terrible rock-raggae-pop track (the reggae bit is apparently why Shakira thought of Rihanna) whose video doesn’t look to be much better, if the mini preview that’s been released is anything to go by.

The video is sure to include the following:

  • some light lesbo action (to keep male visitors enthralled, I suppose)

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  • some wall-humping

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And God knows what else, really. The song sucks, so the video won’t really be any better – even Rihanna’s twerking looks phoned in. It’ll probably do okay in the charts (definitely not a #1) by virtue of the artists performing it, but I think it’s a bit of a let down, myself.

Have a look:


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Rihanna’s Naked Again – This Time With Snakes!

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You have to hand it to Rihanna for her consistency, if nothing else. Homegirl just loves being naked. She also loves to get people talking, and she’s hoping to do it again with her new shoot for GQ, in which she appears naked… with real live snakes! Mon dieu!

The last thing I want is a snake around my neck, dead or alive, that’s for sure, but Rihanna probably thinks it makes her edgier, so let’s just all try and support this bullshit. I do think it’s a nice idea for a photo shoot, I suppose – it’s very different, a little Medusa-esque, the weird contacts are cool… Good stuff, right?

I think the most surprising photo shoot we’ll ever see from Rihanna is one in which the girl has clothes on, though. I mean, damn.

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Rihanna Is a Muslim Now, Right?

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Rihanna is still in the midst of her Diamonds world tour, and her latest jaunt has taken her to Abu Dhabi. In case you don’t know much about Abu Dhabi, it’s the capital and second largest city in the United Arab Emirates and has a very largely Muslim population (and a lot of non-Muslim expats). Rihanna, completely oblivious to the concept of cultural appropriation (see: here), decided it’d be a great idea to take off her thong and nipple covers and put on a hijab to have a fashion shoot at the Shaikh Zayed Mosque this weekend, which…. WHY? Yes, it’s required for female visitors to the Mosque – which offers daily tours to visitors – to cover their heads. It’s respectful to locals to abide by their customs, but to stage a fashion shoot like you’re the new face of Islamic culture? SMH SMH SMH.

It’s not at all surprising that Rihanna sees no problem in turning something with such cultural and religious significance to those who ACTUALLY OBSERVE IT into a lighthearted ~fashion~ thing (she literally captioned one of her photos with “Fashion killaz in Abu Dhabi”), but it’s mindblowing that no one in her entourage thought, you know, maybe this isn’t so respectful? Perhaps the cloud of weed smoke also clouded their judgment.

Y’all know I love me some RiRi, but I cannot abide this fuckery.

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Rihanna Has a Stalker and He Just Broke Into Her House

From TMZ:

A man was arrested outside of Rihanna‘s Southern California home in the Pacific Palisades … after neighbors saw the guy snooping around and apprehended him … TMZ has learned.

Law enforcement sources tell us … the suspect has told police someone emailed him instructions on how to get into the home … so he rolled over to the property and followed the directions.

We’re told the instructions worked … because the man was able to get inside the home … where he allegedly snooped around for a while before neighbors noticed something was up.

Our sources tell us … neighbors went over to the home and confronted the man — and eventually detained him when they realized he didn’t belong there. Police were called to the scene and took the man into custody.

The man is currently being investigated for burglary.

There’s an update to this story, which is that the bro in question actually entered Rihanna‘s neighbours home, mistakenly thinking it was hers. Luckily she wasn’t there at the time – she’s off in Hawaii drinking, smoking weed and having sex with Chris Brown in some prolonged, debauched celebration of her 25th birthday, so she didn’t have to come in contact with the crazy.

It makes sense to me that Rihanna has a stalker, and frankly I’m surprised this hasn’t happened sooner. I mean, have you read some of the comments on her Instagram account? I’d be terrified to live my daily life if I was her (though I think she’s generally too stoned to care). The suspect is lucky Chris Brown wasn’t around – he would have gotten a good beating.

Special thanks to Evill Beet Gossip