November 2014

celebrities

Richard Simmons isn’t doing too well these days

You have to be a pretty miserable person in life not to enjoy Richard Simmons. He’s adorable! He has amazing hair and wears tiny sequined shorts and does jazz hands every day of his life. What’s not to love? He also seems to be a really sweet, genuine guy who actually cares about all the people he meets and works with on a daily basis. However, things aren’t all that cheerful for Richard lately, as apparently he’s suffering from depression as a result of a physical illness he’s been experiencing over the past year. Oh no! From TMZ: Various people who are extremely close to Richard tell TMZ … he has gone radio silent with them, he does not accept or return phone calls, and he has his housekeeper turn people away when they come to visit him. Richard has not shown up at his famed studio, Slimmons in Beverly Hills for months. Simmons was a fixture there, regularly teaching classes. The staff offers no explanation for his prolonged absence. A source extremely close to Richard — one of the few people with whom he is in contact —  tells TMZ the fitness guru is in a massive state of depression over a bum knee. He says doctors told Richard he needs a left knee replacement and if he doesn’t get one he will never be able to exercise again. The source says Richard is terrified of the surgery and has put it off all year. He had a right knee replacement 4 years ago and he put off the surgery for nearly a decade … he was that frightened. We’re told Richard has tried stem cell and red blood platelet therapy — like Kobe Bryant — but it failed. That’s so sad! However, it could be SO much worse – it could have been cancer or something equally as fatal, but it isn’t. However, I guess since exercise is his love and livelihood, it actually does make a massive difference and I can see why he’d be depressed. We need his happiness, though. Come on, Richard! Follow us on Twitter | Facebook

celebrities

James Franco is releasing an album inspired by The Smiths

James Franco truly is a modern renaissance man, a jack of all trades. Is there nothing he can’t do? In addition to his acting work, writing, and visual art, he’s now a singer-songwriter and he’s releasing an album inspired by The Smiths (and an accompanying film, as well). Joy! From Pitchfork: James Franco has a band with Tim O’Keefe, his former art school classmate. They’re called Daddy, and they’ve just announced Let Me Get What I Want, an album/film inspired by the Smiths. It is not, however, a straight-up cover of the Smiths classic. In Franco’s newest book of poetry, Directing Herbert White: Poems, there are two sections titled “Poems Inspired by Smiths’ Songs”. (Which is exactly what you think it is.) Franco and O’Keefe decided to write songs around those poems, using Franco’s words as the lyrics. So: “This Charming Man” is a song based on a poem based on a song, as are all of the songs on Let Me Get What I Want. Make sense? Most amazingly, they got former Smiths bassist Andy Rourke to play on every song. The album will be out in 2015, and every song will be accompanied by a video that, when watched in sequence, adds up to a single story. Each song is also accompanied by a painting by Franco. Huh. I feel like James Franco has too much time on his hands and I don’t really know what’s up with him. Anyway, here’s the video for ‘This Charming Man’:

celebrities

Bryan Cranston reads ‘You Have to F*cking Eat’ and it’s glorious!

We all remember how the Internet exploded when Samuel L. Jackson read the now infamous Go The Fuck To Sleep, but now that book has a sequel and it’s being narrated by none other than Walter White himself, Bryan Cranston. I think Bryan was a perfect pick for You Have to Fucking Eat, and basically this clip is everything you need to get through this Thursday. Lucky for all of us, Audible is offering the entire uncensored audio book for FREE on their site, and you can download that here, if that’s your thing. I don’t know if this one has all the shine of the original, but it’s still pretty solid and hilarious. Follow us on Twitter | Facebook

celebrities

Kim Kardashian gives us full frontal nudity for ‘Paper’

Yesterday, the Internet was apparently broken because Kim Kardashian decided to show us her very shiny bare ass. Well, things are getting a little more serious today, as it turns out the shoot actually included full frontal nudity for her feature in Paper Mag. Pics are below the cut as they’re very NSFW, but it’s nothing you haven’t seen before if you’ve followed the trajectory of Kim Kardashian’s career up to this point. Everyone keeps talking about how good she looks, and how happy, but why wouldn’t she be happy? She made a name for herself naked, and she’s still naked and riding the wave of that success, so to speak. I mean, look, you wanna get naked? Do your thing. The woman likes getting her bits out – so what? I just kinda wonder what the point is. Like, the point of this entire thing. We all know what Kim Kardashian’s various bits and bobs look like – we’ve all seen things going in and out of her various crevices and what she looks like with and without varying levels of clothing for yers – but how on earth does this have anything to do with anything? What’s it got to do with her the accompanying interview, which contains passages like the following?: I ask her whether Kim Kardashian would exist without social media. “I don’t think so…” she says, slowly, then reconsiders. “I don’t think social media was that heavy when we started our show, but I think we really evolved with social media.” The next day, as I scroll through Instagram, I come across a photograph of her, taken the night of our interview, wearing the champagne getup at a restaurant in Venice. I also find two photos of North toddling around the pumpkin patch in a tiny fringed cape and Baby Vans. One of these pictures has more than a million likes. “I love sharing my world with people,” Kardashian tells me, and I detect no hint of falseness. “That’s just who I am.” No more, no less. Sigh. Life. Follow us on Twitter | Facebook