Douchebag

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Doug Stanhope: Johnny Depp ‘thanked’ me for ‘being honest’ about Amber Heard

Embed from Getty Images Just days after Amber Heard first went to court, seeking and receiving a restraining order against Johnny Depp after she presented a mountain of evidence that Depp was a domestic abuser, Depp’s good friend Doug Stanhope came out to defend his bro. Stanhope, a comedian, wrote an “op-ed” for The Wrap about how all of Depp’s friends knew that Amber was a super-manipulative wet blanket and everybody hated her and she was crying abuse to blackmail Depp. It was one of the biggest douche-bro defenses I’ve ever read. Amber thought so too. She filed a lawsuit against Stanhope for defamation days later. I sincerely hoped that the lawsuit would shut him up. It did not. Stanhope appeared on Howard Stern’s show on Monday to tell his side of the story. Douchebag says what? Johnny Depp’s pal Doug Stanhope broke his silence about the defamation lawsuit Amber Heard filed over the explosive op-ed he wrote for TheWrap, in which he claimed that the actress was blackmailing her estranged husband. Stanhope, 49, was a guest on The Howard Stern Show on Monday, June 20. He told Stern that Legalzoom.com is defending him in the case. “Anything that I say, they can twist my words,” the comedian complained. “It’s such a bulls–t suit.” He went on to detail his side of the story about the article, and how it went viral after it was posted on TheWrap on May 29, six days after Heard filed for divorce from Depp. “I put it on my website. The title was ‘At a Loss for Words’ … whatever it was. TheWrap got it as an exclusive, however that worked, and said, ‘Amber Heard Is Blackmailing Johnny Depp — This Is How I Know.’ I didn’t write that f–king title. I didn’t put that stupid tabloid title in there. I’m a better writer than that, so I don’t know if it’s hinged on that, I don’t know how much of it is spite.” While Heard called the piece “highly defamatory,” Stanhope said that Johnny Depp was happy with it. “I had no contact with [Depp] until he texted me after that went out and said, ‘Hey, thanks for being honest.’ He didn’t know that was going out. I was a little petrified because it kind of made him look like a bitch. ‘Cause he was kind of a bitch,” he said. Although he admitted it “still feels like name-dropping,” Stanhope maintained that he didn’t write the op-ed for publicity, and said the lawsuit is comical to him because he doesn’t have millions of dollars to lose. “The idea of some Hollywood supermodel lady winning all of my s–t … She would be locking the doors driving down my street even without seeing a person. I live on the Mexican border in this dirty pothole-riddled neighborhood.” Stanhope still stands by what he wrote, and repeated his allegations from the article on the radio show. “I visited him that day,” he said of May 21, the day Heard says Depp hit her with a cellphone during a violent argument. “He was alluding to the fact that she was going to do something like this. She didn’t come out until a week later that that happened. But it happened that night, and he was alluding to she’s going to do something like this.” “I think what she’s trying to do is make me shut the f–k up,” Stanhope concluded. “Because I can’t say anything about it, and now I’m talking more.” [From Us Weekly] The most interesting part is that Depp called him to “thank” him for being “honest” after the op-ed was published. If you go back and read the op-ed, it’s not like Stanhope was being honest about witnessing whatever dynamic between Amber and Johnny. He was being “honest” about the sh-t Depp had told him, stuff which Stanhope just took as gospel. Depp told Stanhope that Amber was going to claim that he (Depp) was abusive. And since Stanhope is incapable of critical thinking, he just believed that Depp was some kind of savant rather than an abuser who was enlisting his bros’ help in gaslighting his victimized wife. Embed from Getty Images Photos courtesy of Getty, Fame/Flynet.

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Iggy Azalea: ‘I’m not going to suddenly start rapping about political matters’

This is the second five-page, intensive, wordy magazine interview I’ve read in the past 24 hours. Tina Fey was worth it – Iggy Azalea is not. Iggy covers the new issue of Elle Canada and she looks like a sad Barbie doll in the editorial. While she freely admits that she’s had work done – and sure, I’m happy that she admits it – I still don’t understand why she’s messed with her face to this extent. She was pretty before all of this. Anyway, Iggy is about to release her new album, Digital Distortion. And she’s trying to rebrand herself in ways beyond her new face. In this Elle interview, she even comes close to sounding regretful. You can read the full piece here. She’s back on social media after a self-imposed hiatus: “I’m back. But this time I’ve given myself some rules so I don’t get too sucked in again. For me, what happened, not just on social media but with everything in my career, was like a whirlwind. I started to feel like I was losing control over my own life… I even think back to the Papa John’s incident and ask myself ‘Why did that piss you off so much?’ I see now that it spiralled into something so quickly because I felt like I didn’t have any power over my own life. At that point, I needed to take some time, step away and just get that control back.” Her fraught relationship with the hip-hop community: “So many people think that I don’t care about rap music and the community, but I absolutely care about it, to the core of my being. That’s why the Q-Tip incident annoyed me so much: Why do you think I need a history lesson? Because surely if I did know anything about hip hop, I wouldn’t mix pop and rap together? Or I wouldn’t rap in an American accent if I truly understood? I just have a different perspective about rap music. I love learning about hip hop, I love reading about it and I actually love having debates with other people about it.” Whether there are valid criticisms aimed at her: “Do you not like me because I rap with an American accent and I’m not American? Well, that’s valid on some level because that’s your opinion and I can’t change that. But I’m not trying to sound black—I just grew up in a country where on TV and in music and film, everyone was American or any Australian person in them put on an American accent. So I never saw it as strange at all. And I think it’s hard for Americans to understand this because, when you look at the entertainment industry, American culture is the dominating culture across the globe. A lot of people say ‘Imagine if someone rapped with a fake Australian accent.’ Well, okay, but you don’t turn on the TV and hear American people with fake Australian accents, so I don’t think it’s a fair comparison. I grew up watching Nicole Kidman speaking with an American accent in every movie. Even Keith Urban sings with an American country accent. And that’s just what you have to do to make it in this industry and be accepted. It’s what I heard and it’s what I saw, so how can you not understand that that would be influential for me?” The racial part of the conversation: “It’s black culture and black music, so it becomes a racial conversation—versus Keith Urban, who is making country music, which is considered white. It becomes a very muddy area. And it became especially difficult in 2015. The United States has such a fraught history with race, and I don’t think I realized how prevalent racism still is and how hurt people still are until I moved here and saw it for myself. As I was growing up in Australia, it was easy to think ‘Well, that was then and obviously it’s not like that now.’ It’s not something you can understand when you’re on the other side of the world. But many people think I still live in that bubble and that I don’t understand that the United States is set up in a way that doesn’t benefit minorities. I’ve lived here for 10 years now, and I don’t want it to be that way either. I’m marrying a black man, and my children will be half black—of course I care about these things. And I understand if you’re not comfortable that I rap with an American accent, and you are totally entitled to your own opinions, but you don’t have to listen to my music. I’m still going to keep making music.” Her future goals in music: “I think it’s important for music to reflect what is going on socially and for there to be those kinds of voices within the industry. But I want to be that person you can listen to for four minutes and not think about that stuff at all, and it’s important to have that too…. I’m not going to suddenly start rapping about political matters; it’s just not what I do. There are other great people who do that, like Kendrick Lamar and J. Cole. I’m not here to offer that commentary, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care. I don’t think everyone has to be everything—like, does Katy Perry have to start making songs about politics? I think it’s good to still be able to have a little fun.” Her plastic surgery: “I think, in 2016, people should be more accepting of the fact that both famous and non-famous women are having cosmetic procedures. That’s just the reality. And I think more people need to admit that sh-t so it doesn’t have to be so taboo—because we’re all doing it anyway. I wanted to change my nose because I didn’t grow up with a bump on it—that happened when I got smashed in the face with a soccer ball when I was 16. Now I feel like my nose looks the way it’s supposed to look. But for how long do we have to acknowledge that I got a nose job? For the rest of my life?… There’s nothing black and white about beauty or plastic surgery. There are no guarantees that it will fix how you feel about yourself. All of those women [who criticize someone for having surgery]—if they had $10 million in their account tomorrow, I’d dare them not to change one thing about themselves or at least think about it. Yes, there are some women who wouldn’t change a thing, but, for the majority of us, we’d be thinking about that one thing. And there’s nothing wrong with that. I just hope that in 25 years the conversation will shift to where if a woman wants to change her body, all we say is ‘Good for her!’ instead of shaming her for making decisions about her own body.” [From Elle Canada] G—damn it, I found myself agreeing with her at several points in this interview. Do I still think she’s a culturally appropriating douchebag? Sure. But I also see her point – to a certain extent – about how American culture dominates across the world, and how that affected how she raps. Does that explain everything? No, of course not. I also think she should be forgiven for everything involving Azealia Banks, because those moments were not actually about Black Lives Matter or any serious conversation, it was about how Iggy and Azealia absolutely despise each other. Photos courtesy of Elle Canada.

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“Miley Cyrus is wearing her engagement ring again, of course” links

A photo posted by Miley Cyrus (@mileycyrus) on Jan 18, 2016 at 7:07am PST Miley Cyrus is wearing her engagement ring again & she’s moved her stuff into Liam Hemsworth’s home, because of course. [Dlisted] Ted Cruz was a douchebag in college, unsurprisingly. [The Blemish] Should you date Matt Bomer or Henry Cavill? Hm. [Buzzfeed] Donald Trump humiliated Jeb! Bush. [OMG Blog] Jessica Biel got pap’d wearing a terrible outfit. [Popoholic] Beyonce’s going to take over the Super Bowl Half-time show. [LaineyGossip] Kim Zolciak & her husband got frisky on camera. [The Hollywood Sigh] Teen Mom UK is happening. I’m sorry, UK. [ICYDK] I should throw a party for the anniversary of Roe v. Wade. [The Frisky] On Jeopardy last night, everyone lost. [Seriously OMG WTF] I think this Suicide Squad poster is really cool, surprisingly. [IDLY]